On a pretty standard Tuesday, my brain was being a real asshole. It seems to be fixated on my tummy lately, and is being a cranky bitch about my cushier frame these days. "I should be back to my pre-pregnancy weight by now!" it hollers. "I shouldn't have this extra padding around my belly and thighs. And my ass is extra enormous now. How am I gonna get a strict pull-up now???"
It was pretty unbearable, being stuck with my jerk-ass brain. So I decided to do something about it.
First, I started reading this:
I decided it's time to own my body, right where it is. Part of that means owning "Fat" as an adjective, instead of a pejorative. Because: why the hell not?
So far this book is the shit. I'm only a little bit in though, so we'll see. I love the hell out of Virgie Tovar. Man, that gal is rad.
Next up, I bought these.
Cute ladies with big thighs, hips, and bottoms? PURCHASED.
Something about looking at those ladies makes me really happy. You can totally be cute with big-ass thighs and the rest of it. If you find some rad art that has bodies like your body represented in a cool way, I suggest you get that shit for your wall.
After all that, I asked my partner to take me rollerskating.
I'm a retired roller derby girl, and skating in my happy place. Just rolling around, doing figure eights, and cross-overs and the rest to disco and R&B and pop lights up my heart. If you're feeling terrible about yourself? Go play.
I know all those professionals tell you to exercise if you're feeling depressed, but honestly, who wants one more chore to do when they're feeling bad? No one. Find some type of physical play you enjoy, and go do it. For me, that's skating. For you it might be playing Marco Polo in the pool, or moving your shit to some old house jams. Just do it. Your endorphins will thank you.
Lastly, I made some art. Because.