Leggings can be pants, and minivans are rad. There, I said it. I feel better.
I've been thinking about this ever since I read this article on Jalopnik posted awhile back: If You're a Real Grown-Up, Minivans Are Cooler than Cross-Overs. The crux of the article is that people are driving cross-over vehicles because of the inherent uncoolness of minivans, and that's pretty dumb because minivans provide a lot more worth in terms of space for hauling stuff, height to get in, and making your life easier if you have kids. But since minivans are seen as uncool, people feel like they're "settling" if they drive one. As a consequence, they're driving cross-overs that have less space, are ridiculous for driving around a city, and make your life harder, not easier, all in the service of not wanting to seem like you've settled.
I see this same shit all the time when it comes to bodies and fashion. Just the other day, I cleaned out my shoe space and donated a bunch of pairs of heels, t-straps, and boots to Goodwill, because girl, I ain't 25 anymore. I had a baby, and I'm 35 now, and my feet have just HAD IT with uncomfortable shoes. No thanks.
I had some feelings about it too. Does giving up heels mean that I'm not a desirable, young, sexy woman anymore? What will lengthen my legs and make me look a reasonable height now? And on and on. Because heels do a lot for you in terms of making you look more fuckable, true fact. But is that practical anymore, for me?
Maybe. I'm still down for gettin' down. But I don't need shoes that make me uncomfortable. So I compromised, and gave away the pinchy, no arch support pairs, and kept a few for special occasions.
The same principle applies to a lot of stuff though, especially for anything that makes women comfortable and more able to focus on the shit they have to do, rather than how they look. I spend a lot of time bending over to pick up toys, pacifiers, and baby, and I don't want passersby to get a glimpse of my coin slot. So pants have to be stretchy. I wear leggings a lot. Does that mean I've settled?
Maybe, sure. But does it matter? Y'all, we've had kids. Ain't nobody fooled. We are now solidly in that era of needing things to be functional because kids are a game changer. And it does no one any favors to get down on people for "settling", just because they want their lives to be a little easier and more functional.
And for that matter, why is parenthood less of a cool choice? Yes, I know, overpopulation, whatever. But we are all here because our parents sucked it up and had us, and in past generations, that was a plenty cool life choice. Our parents didn't give a fuck. So why is everyone trying to be a hipster parent and erase all markings of having had kids? Because society has made it uncool.
Well fuck that. Minivans are dope, flats are the shit, and leggings are pants.
And spoiler alert: gravity is a law, so we're all going to settle eventually. Let's not make that harder than it has to be.